How are you showing up?

I asked this question on a photo I posted on Instagram the other night after working on myself, my beliefs, my dreams and how fully present I am in all the moments I go through each and single day.

Have you ever asked yourself the following questions:

–       Am I really showing up right now?

–       Am I fully present in this very moment or is my mind somewhere else?

–       Am I thinking about what will happen next?

–       Am I looking for something familiar, a sequence I can remember and relate to so I can set my mind & body on autopilot?

–       Am I making excuses for why I shouldn’t be in this very moment and allow myself to feel whatever my body and mind want to feel?

How many of the questions could you nod ‘YES’ to or at least relate to in some form or shape?

Most of us would be nodding yes to the majority of these questions. It’s incredibly hard to live in the very moment & be present at all times– however it’s a skill that can be developed if you really want. Awareness is the first step on the road to showing up every single day in your life.

Now, you might be a tad confused and ask yourself “What does she mean ‘showing up’? I show up every day – to work, to training, to my family. I’m always there!”

When I say ‘showing up’, no I don’t mean showing up in your physical form, but rather in a mental & spiritual form.

Now, back to my light bulb-moment (I have quite a few of these!) through practicing yoga.

I finally, brutally and honestly, asked myself with judging thoughts: ‘Am I really showing up? In this very moment, am I really present with everything that I am, with my entire being?’ I wasn’t. And in that very moment was when I decided to let go of a whole lot of things that kept me from being in the present, from showing up. I let go of my expectations of how I needed to act or feel in the moment, what would come at me when I would walk out the door that night or what would happen tomorrow if I didn’t follow a certain routine – it’s scary to let go. But I did – and it overwhelmed me with joy, happiness and satisfaction. Because I allowed myself to show up and feel whatever I NEEDED to feel in that very moment – not what I was suppose to feel, but what I spiritually and mentally was made to feel.

We’re creatures of habit and we cling to what we know – often this is a mistake. Why? Well, ask yourself this: How will you ever experience a newfound joy, a newfound happiness, a new self-discovery if you keep doing the same thing over and over again? It won’t ever happen, I’m sorry to break this to you.

So, how will you start showing up more often? Well, start small and work your way up to incorporating more awareness in your everyday life. These are a few of the things I’d like you to think about and try:

–       In a meeting: Am I really engaging in this meeting/conversation or is my mind thinking about the emails I have to clear when I get back to my desk? Zone back into yourself and pack up the thoughts in a little box (visually), set it aside and tell yourself ‘it can wait’.

–       At yoga/training: Am I really showing up and allowing myself to feel every inch of my entire self or am I hiding these feelings because it’s too painful? Allow yourself to feel – just let go, and embrace feelings, good or bad. It will detoxify your body and let your brain process these feelings in a different way that will ultimately lead to joy, happiness and clarity.

–       With family & friends: Am I thinking about work, training, house-duties etc. and letting my mind drift off when my loved ones speak to me? Are the words being heard but not understood? Take a deep breath and let your mind know that nothing is as important as being in the moment. You will never get this moment back. And whatever is in this moment is perfect, because nothing else will be just like it. Do you really want to miss out on that?

–       At the end of the day, sit down and take out a notepad and a pen. Start scribbling down moments you were in but didn’t register fully in your brain because you weren’t showing up. Do this every single night for 2 weeks – then after 2 weeks, go back and read these notes, look at yourself with honesty & ask yourself if you can change these things moving forward? If you’re now aware of your behaviour in these very moments, can you change them if you’re in this situation again and show up more fully?

I won’t lie to you – it’s not going to be easy, but it’s going to be worth it. I believe that everything that is worth having in life is hard(er) to get to. But this I promise you; when you fully learn to show up in these moments, day after day, month after month, year after year, you will find a peacefulness and joy within that no one can take away from you unless you allow them to.

All my love, Caroline x